What motivates you? What drives you? What is the one thing you cannot live without? For me, it’s overall creativity and freedom of thought and expression. That’s something that I put in the back closet for a long time…instead of moving in full force to achieve my dreams and goals…I stopped. Somewhere along the way, I stopped. If you know me, then you know that’s not normal for me…I almost had to drop out of college due to lack of funding…but I’m the girl who e-mailed the president of the university and was able to come across the funding to stay in school and graduate based off of that one e-mail. Once I graduated, I went in full force to pursue my dreams and I was on the right track…but somewhere along the way I derailed and lost sight of achieving my dreams. I lost focus and stopped.
Eventually, I got tired of being knocked down, denied, and crushed because of the lack of resources that were available to me. This happens to many of us somewhere along the way…and I totally lost my focus. But one day…as I looked into my daughter’s eyes, I realized that I wanted more for her future and for mines as well. I didn’t want her to think that mediocre living was okay, so I began to live once again through the gift that God has given me. I live for creativity! At times, I did become frustrated and discouraged by the lack of support that I was receiving from my former relationship…yet I continued to press on with my daughter on my hip. I am blessed to have come across some amazing entrepreneurs that encouraged me to pursue what I love.
Jermaine Pratt of JPratt foot wear once said to me when I had my daughter on my hip at Philly Fashion Week “hey, she has to get used to the runway shows, this is what you do and she’ll be apart of it someday.” I ran across Big Rube Harley in Center city one day and he said to me “don’t worry about the bills or anything because they’re gonna be there regardless, just go for what you love to do…don’t worry about that stuff.” Big Rube is such a cool dude and he is a photographer for the Daily News, high fashion photographer being booked in NY now, co-owns a farmer’s market, and he used to co-own Mitchell &Ness in Philadelphia. What he said does sound scary…especially having a child…however I see what he is saying. Basically, he’s saying “Live your Dreams”, and I agree…but I won’t be quitting my job anytime soon.
Even Philly’s own Hip Hop Artist Chase Allen…I first found out about him at the Philly Wine Mixer and I just liked his performance at first. I received a copy of his mix tape and decided to listen to it one night and since then…I’ve been a fan. My go to track on his mix tape “Tunnel Vision”, is track 4, “Passion”, that song hit home for me. Basically, he talks about Passion in three parts…his passion for music, his moms passion for his father, and Jesus’ passion for the world. The hook is “you gotta have passion, you gotta have passion, if all else fails….at least you got your passion.” That alone had me thinking…do I have my passion?
For a long time, I lost myself…I lost myself to the pain and hurt of regret and doubt. Being around individuals who are moving and continue to make moves…I decided that its time for me to move again. There’s no growth in staying still…sometimes for a moment we do need to be still because of life’s circumstances, however at some point it’s time to pick up and start moving again….and that’s where I am. Where are you?